“, “If the child watches too much TV”, “The child does not eat well”, etc.

If the children are playing around

This type of behavior is quite common among younger ones, especially four-year-olds. If children fool around too often or at the wrong times, it can cause serious problems.

How to prevent the problem

Give your children plenty of opportunities to indulge, and even encourage them to do so at designated times. If they are fooling around at this particular time, tell them that they are doing well because they are not bothering anyone, and that adults are having fun watching them.
Sometimes offer to indulge yourself, helping children understand that this is not at all bad behavior, if you don’t bother anyone and don’t spoil things.

It may turn out that a child who fools around too much or pretends to be a buffoon is actually trying to get away from some serious problems in his life.
He hides under a “mask”, trying to avoid unbearable tension. The same kind of behavior can develop due to the fact that he sees the attention and admiration of other children and some adults.
Discuss with other family members and teachers what the child may be hiding behind the mask of a jester, what he is trying to drown out with such behavior.
If you see that the child is calm and serious, use this opportunity to talk to him about what worries him. Invite him to draw a picture that “no one will see except you two.”
If your child begins to act out at an inopportune moment and you need to interrupt his antics, firmly address him with the words: “Right now it is very important that you be serious. We'll be done in 10 minutes and you can play around as much as you want."

Hysterics

Very young children throw tantrums because they often lack the words to express their needs. Dissatisfaction from misunderstanding accumulates and results in tears and screams. Child preschool age A person who regularly throws tantrums, and who does not suffer from language or mental development delays, may be under stress. There can be many reasons for this - adults’ demands are too high or too low, neglect of his needs or cruel punishments, discord in the family, physical illness associated with severe pain, excessive spoiling or lack of social skills.

How to prevent the problem

Think about how to provide children with enough opportunities to vent their feelings and emotions.
There will be fewer emotional breakdowns if you give your child the opportunity to act according to his own plan and understanding (with your support and supervision), i.e. you will not suppress his initiative and independence.

How to deal with a problem if it already exists

Try to ignore the tantrums, just make sure that the problem remains within the safe limits. Remember that the purpose of this behavior is to achieve what you want or to “let off steam.” In any case, if you pay attention to the tantrum (whether positive or negative), you help such things happen more often.
If a child confuses others with his hysterics, then quickly take him to the side away from the “spectators.” Calmly tell him: “Sometimes a person gets very angry, and that’s normal. But it is NOT at all normal when this person starts to interfere with everyone else. When you feel that you have calmed down, you can return to us (the children).”
Ask more experienced people to watch the child with you - perhaps you, without knowing it, are doing something that provokes the child into hysterics.
Discuss possible reasons such behavior with other family members. Think together about how to solve this problem.

Active children

Activity often irritates adults who want everything around them to be “decent and orderly.” At the same time, for a child, movement is both a sign and a means of development and growth, i.e. natural need.

For the most part, children want to cope with their problems because they see the reaction of adults who are dissatisfied with their behavior. But this can truly be done only by understanding whether this is really a problem, and not the child’s natural need for movement, and also by finding out its reasons.

How to prevent problems

It is important to help overexcited children feel confident and teach self-control and self-respect.
Inform children in advance about upcoming activities: “Now we will get dressed and go for a walk. We'll be back in about an hour and have lunch. Put on your boots and jacket and let’s go.”
If possible, stick to your daily routine - sleep, eat, walk, at the same time.
Learn to see positive aspects in the child’s activity: he quickly gets involved in the action, quickly completes the work.
Do not offer your child activities that require sitting in one place for too long.

How to deal with a problem if it already exists

An overly energetic child needs to be given time and the opportunity to throw out his energy in a way that does not harm either him or others: tumble on a mattress, crawl under chairs, squeeze a ball or strength meter in his hand.
To help active child to concentrate, take him on your lap, or hold him with your hand on his shoulders, with both hands on his forearms.
As often as possible, when the child is calm, let him know that his overactive behavior is improving: “See, you have already been able to concentrate for a long time. You must be proud of yourself now.”
Entrust him with tasks in which his activity is needed - to gather everyone to the table, to bring the necessary item.

Absent-minded children

For the most part, children want to cope with their problems because they see the reaction of adults who are dissatisfied with their behavior. But you can truly deal with the problem only by finding out its causes. Perhaps the child has a hearing impairment and simply does not hear your task, or he has poor vision and cannot distinguish from a distance what you are asking about. In the end, the child can think, dream or fantasize.

How to prevent problems

Have your child's hearing and vision checked by a specialist.
Ask your child to tell or draw something that he has been thinking about for so long (perhaps he has a huge inner world, and this is a completely different side of the matter).
Try to keep the children's room from looking too distracting.
Patiently repeat the task several times, gradually increasing the amount of information you give. For example, first: “Ask grandma where the box of thread is.” Then: “Ask grandma where the box of thread is, find it and bring me black thread.”

How to deal with a problem if it already exists

Work with your child one-on-one more often, this will make it easier for him to concentrate.
To ensure that nothing distracts your child when he is working at the table, place a low cardboard screen on the table.
Let your child know that his behavior is improving: “You have already been able to concentrate for so long that you have completed the entire puzzle. You must be proud of yourself now.”
Do not overload your child with tasks that require maximum concentration, so as not to get the opposite effect - feelings of resistance, boredom, rejection.
Teach the necessary skills at the moment and in the content when the child is interested. For example, when a child is bathing in the bathroom, count with him how many bottles there are, which one is the tallest, which one will hold more water, etc.

If your child clings to you all the time

If the child does not move a single step, clings to you, clings to you, this may be an indicator nervous tension which he is experiencing. This behavior is quite typical if the child just started kindergarten or was sick, if there was a baby in the house or if any of his urgent, justified needs were not satisfied. For example, in communication, play, movement, sleep.

How to prevent problems

Offer your child more exciting and active activities practical classes. Give him enough freedom to act as he sees fit.
Relieve the feeling of insecurity by talking to him from different ends of the room: “I see you are removing the rings from the pyramid,” “You decided to rock the doll.”
Try to satisfy the child’s needs: he should have a comfortable place to rest and play, and toys should be freely available. If a child wants to chew something, place a bowl with pieces of carrots, cabbage, and turnips in a visible place.

How to deal with a problem if it already exists

If you know that your child is going through a difficult period due to family circumstances, then give him extra attention for a while.
Introduce a limit on your direct contact, for example, set a timer and say: “In two minutes, I will go about my business, and you choose your game.”
Don't push or pull him, this will make the feeling of insecurity even worse. Support him and praise him when he plays from a distance: “Good girl, play with the dolls. I’ll be nearby to iron the clothes.”
Invite your child’s friends or peers to visit, invite them different games. Ask your child to teach his friends how to play his favorite game.
Provide your child with responsibilities around the house: clearing the table, sweeping, pouring water into the cat’s bowl.

If your child is teasing and swearing

This problem presents a certain complexity because, on the one hand, adults do not want to “let go” of using swear words, and on the other hand, they know that if they pay too much attention to it, children will swear even more.

You shouldn’t assume that children get everything bad. kindergarten. In reality, all children, without exception, have heard these words before somewhere and sometime before, but now they have reached the age when they are interested in experiencing their effect firsthand. Generally, there are two typical periods when children argue: from 2.5 to 3.5 years and from 4 to 5.

How to prevent problems

Talk to your child about the meaning of words that people commonly use to express negative emotions. For example: I don’t like it, I’m angry, I’m unpleasant, I’m angry, I’m hurt, etc.
When your child expresses his feelings in acceptable words, praise him: “It’s great that you explained to us how you feel in a human way.”

How to deal with a problem if it already exists

First you need to figure out why he says swear words. This may be a desire to attract the attention of an adult or other children. This may be one way to gain some power over others by driving adults out of patience by hurting children. This may be an automatic reaction to resentment or anger - the child sees that the parents are doing just that.
If a child is looking for attention and power, completely ignore his words. If other people or children complain to you about this, say: “I heard it and didn’t pay attention to it. You can do the same." Do not show any excitement or anger, as this is what the child wants. A few minutes later, calmly talk to your child about not using these words.
If your child utters swear words automatically or in imitation of adults, intervene immediately, but very calmly. Tell him that these words may hurt others.

If the child fusses and cries too much

This behavior certainly worries and sometimes irritates adults or leads to the child being teased by peers.

To change the situation, you need to understand the reasons for this child’s behavior.

How to prevent problems

Make sure that the child is healthy and that no one is scaring or offending him on the sly.
Offer your child more fun, active, hands-on activities. Give him enough freedom so that he can decide and act as he sees fit.
Relieve the feeling of insecurity and uncertainty by talking to him from different ends of the room: “I see how you draw,” “You decided to tidy up the doll’s room.”
Try to satisfy the child’s needs as much as possible: he should have a comfortable place to rest and play, and toys should be freely available. If a child feels the need to constantly chew something, place a bowl with pieces of carrots, cabbage, beets, and turnips in a visible place.
Do not limit drawing, ask for explanations of the drawings.

How to deal with a problem if it already exists

If a child three years old or older is naughty, do not react to his tears, but say: “Tell me what’s wrong and I will know how to help you.”
When the child is calm, tell him: “It’s so nice to see, play, talk with you when you don’t cry.”
If your child begins to speak in a cranky tone, interrupt him and say, “Speak normally so I can understand what’s going on.”
Tell your child that he can cry as much as he wants, but only in a place where no one will be disturbed.
Observe your child, make sure that his behavior is not associated with certain times of the day or certain people. For example, a child may cry before bedtime or dinner. If this is the case, be flexible and change your bedtime.

If the child fights

This behavior is much more typical for boys. This is probably due to a whole range of reasons - male hormones, socially expected behavior patterns, rougher play. Girls more often express their aggression through words, expressions of contempt, and “separation” from themselves. Before you do anything, make sure that this is a manifestation of aggressiveness, and not just a game or an inability to explain your desires.

Children see models of this behavior on the street, in popular TV shows, and transfer some of the actions into their games.

Many children are not yet able to fully control strong feelings and act impulsively, unable to understand everything possible consequences of your actions.

It is possible and necessary to teach children to act differently in different circumstances: where necessary, to be able to defend themselves, where necessary, to avoid a fight.

How to prevent problems

Limit your time watching action movies and TV series if you cannot eliminate them completely.
Give your child the opportunity for a natural, constructive outburst of energy - do not forbid running, biking and rollerblading to your heart's content, building houses from chairs, etc.
Make something like a punching bag at home.

How to deal with a problem if it already exists

If children start fighting or struggling at inopportune times, tell them: “Now is our time to play quietly (getting ready for a walk, getting ready for dinner), but later you can fight, just take the mattress.”
Agree with your child on some wrestling rules - don’t trip him, don’t kick him.
If a child takes away toys and things from others, use the method of logical consequences: “If you take away a toy from Kostya, what could happen next?”
Help your child become aware of his behavior. As often as possible, when the child is calm, let him know that his behavior is improving: “You see, you can explain to others what you want without fists, and the children accept your ideas. You must be proud of yourself now.”

Anger and cruelty

Seeing anger and cruelty in children is always very alarming and unpleasant. We wonder if they will grow up to become adults who commit crimes without paying attention to the pain and suffering of other people.

Children who often show anger and cruelty may do this because they feel unprotected and unloved. Or they see examples of such behavior around them too often.

How to prevent problems

Show empathy for the child, make it clear that he is a good person worthy of love, but you do not approve of some of his actions.
Recognize your child's anger and rage as acceptable feelings, but show other ways to express them: “I know you were angry. This is a normal human feeling. If you don't like what... is doing, you say so in words or choose someone else to play." “I understand that you don’t like spiders. I don’t like them either and I’m even afraid, but you can’t kill them, it’s better to step aside, let them quickly run away to their children.”

How to deal with a problem if it already exists

Intervene whenever you see acts of cruelty and make the child fully aware of the consequences of his behavior. “When you kicked Andrey out of the game, he was very offended, he was hurt by the injustice.”
Understand that a child who is cruel is trying to “lift” himself by hurting others. Help this child see the good in himself, which does not depend in any way on comparison with others: “Every person is very important. You can draw so well and love to do it so much that all the children are happy to ask you to help.”
Do not skimp on affection when your child shows good feelings towards others.
Help other children who are subject to cruelty and violence to stand up for themselves: “I will play with whoever I want”, “No one has the right to hurt me”

Shy and reserved

This character trait can remain with a person throughout his life, and people often talk about it with pain and bitterness. One of the reasons for this phenomenon is low self-esteem. The child thinks that they will laugh at him, that others will not accept him, that he is worse than everyone else.

How to prevent problems

Make your child feel loved, wanted, and respected.
Treat your child's ideas and statements with care, even if they are very timid.
Talk to your child about his positive, strong traits as often as possible, so that he still develops a positive image of himself.
Support and encourage the child’s initiatives, the desire to do and decide something on his own.

How to deal with a problem if it already exists

You should intervene only when you see that shyness leads to serious problems: it prevents you from making friends, participating in games and activities.
Do not “put pressure” on the child, do not emphasize his peculiarity, respect his need to be a little aloof, but offer tasks that would require inclusion in the activities of other children.
Start playing or doing an activity with your child, and then invite other children to join you. When the children are playing out, quietly leave.
Be sure to teach your child the right words - how to invite another child to play together.
Every time a shy child plays with others, make a comment: “It’s so nice to see you playing with everyone.”
Limit the time your child can spend alone, tell them that others also want to sit alone.

Experts in the field of psychology identify the following general styles of raising children. This is dictatorship, overprotection, non-interference and cooperation. Each of them has its own characteristics, but all, undoubtedly, have a serious impact on the formation of the child’s personality. Let's look at each of these interactions separately.

Diktat

The desire of parents to completely control the life of a child is perhaps the main problem of upbringing. Brought up under dictatorship, the child is under strict control from adults, completely deprived of initiative. Child psychologists consider such relationships with a child to be the most unfavorable for the formation of his personality. Children who grew up in an environment of family dictatorship, as a rule, suffer from low self-esteem, are withdrawn, and have problems in relationships with peers.

This system of relationships is expressed in the desire of parents to surround the child with increased attention and protect him even in the absence of real danger. As a result, the child is deprived of the opportunity not only to overcome difficulties on his own, but even to soberly evaluate them. The consequences in this case are usually easily predictable. The child develops such qualities as dependence, infantilism, lack of independence, and lack of self-confidence.

Non-interference

Parents who practice this style of raising children are confident that it contributes to the development of initiative and independence in the child. However, this is not always the case. The reluctance of the mother and father to participate in the life of the child causes no less problems in education than excessive guardianship on their part. This approach is dangerous due to the possibility of the child developing “parental alienation syndrome.” As they grow older, it will be difficult for such people to build relationships with others, including loved ones.

Cooperation

According to recent research, collaboration is the most effective parenting style. It is based on the principle of uniting all family members for common goals and objectives, which is reinforced by mutual support for each other in all areas of life. A child who is raised in a cooperative spirit will grow up to be responsive and confident.

You will learn about how show business representatives raise their children by watching the program “We Are Parents!”

5 ways to improve your relationship with your child

Most often, parenting problems arise due to a lack of mutual understanding between parents and children. There are several behaviors that will help improve your relationship with your child.

1. See the personality in the child

Treat your child as an individual with his own character, inclinations, desires and rights. Give children the opportunity to make their own decisions and solve problems while respecting their choices. By doing this, you increase your child's self-esteem and develop independence in him.

2. Use interactive parenting methods

Don't yell at your child, and especially don't hit him, even if he does something you don't like. Accept him as he is. Remember, most best way Getting what you want from your children means getting them interested. If you are too ambitious, balance your own expectations with the baby's capabilities.

3. Be an authority for your child

Learn to understand your offspring in order to see the real motives for his actions. Children are too often left alone with their problems, unable to express their feelings or not believing in the possibility of “reaching out” to adults. In order for a child to ask for help or talk about an exciting topic, he needs to trust his parents, and this largely depends on the behavior of mom and dad.

Spend more time communicating with your child. Child psychologists say that joint activities, such as sports games, hobbies, hiking and reading aloud are best for strengthening the relationship between parents and children. If you have several children, try to find time to communicate with each child, let it be a personal relationship in each case.

Reconsider the parenting methods you are currently using. Leave only the best from this arsenal and start using new, more effective ones. In order not to make a mistake in choosing methods, you can use the following method. Put yourself in the place of a child and imagine how you would like these innovations. Remember, you can successfully solve parenting problems only if your goal is to create a truly friendly and trusting relationship with your child.

Most fathers and mothers who have problems raising a child, as a rule, associate them with the bad character of their child. While children become “difficult” under the influence of many reasons, in particular, due to the prejudiced attitude of their parents towards them. You can learn how to learn to appreciate your child’s individuality by watching the program from the series “We Are Parents!” with a participant musical duet“DaKi” by Kirill Popelnyuk and his mother Irina.

Ekaterina Kushnir

5 minutes to read. Views 2.8k.

As evidenced by our observations and experimental psychological studies, problems in raising children and the development of mental processes in preschoolers occur within the age norm, and deviations in children’s behavior are not caused by clinical symptoms. However, the complications and difficulties that every child experiences worry adults (educators and parents) and require increased attention and special pedagogical skills from them.

Each child is unique, and therefore it is necessary to approach him taking into account the influences that upbringing, training and social environment have on him. Adults need to understand real reasons deviations in the child’s behavior, taking into account his individual typological characteristics, capabilities and interests, family upbringing style.

By observing a child in various situations: how he behaves in new conditions, how he reacts to difficulties while completing educational tasks, and how he resolves conflicts, educators will be able to identify deviations in children’s behavior and correct them.

Undoubtedly, this help will become productive when the model of family relationships is known, the various influences that a child experiences from members of his family - people of different genders, ages, preferences, who act every day, with their actions, intonation, expressions, gestures, facial expressions.

Early emotional experiences are critical to developing a healthy personality. If a child of preschool age develops according to established age norms, then the main reason for deviations in his behavior is mainly improper upbringing in the family.

The absence of a system of value orientations, inconsistency of family disciplinary requirements, and the inability of adults to establish psychological contact with children cause the emergence of such deviations in children's behavior as aggressiveness, isolation, passivity, anxiety, uncertainty, and tearfulness. It is more difficult for such children to get used to new things; they often conflict with peers and members of their family.

Numerous psychological studies by domestic and foreign authors examine the problems of raising children and confirm the great importance of child-parent relationships in the development of each individual. As noted by G.S. Kostyuk, education, which comes down only to external influences (orders, prohibitions, etc.) and ignores internal changes in the thoughts, feelings, needs and aspirations of the pupils, is doomed to failure.

Improper upbringing of children in the family gives rise to negative traits of the child, which first arise as situational phenomena and express her opposition to the rude demands of adults, and are subsequently consolidated and transformed into stable characterological traits.

Let us briefly consider the main types of improper upbringing in relation to a child.

Hypocustody- this is a type of extremely improperly organized upbringing, which manifests itself in complete lack of control and lack of supervision, interest in children's problems and hobbies. Children feel that adults don't care what they do or what happens to them. Lack of constant parental attention, lack of routine, and insufficient control over the child’s behavior often become the reason for becoming acquainted with an antisocial environment.

The absolute opposite of such upbringing is overprotection, which involves excessive guardianship and petty control over every step of the child. A number of constant prohibitions, when a child does not have the right to his own opinion, decision-making, independence and responsibility, gives him the impression that he “cannot do everything,” but his peers “can do everything.” It is clear that under such conditions the child does not have the opportunity to learn from his own mistakes and accumulate personal experience.

Raising a “family idol” manifests itself in excessive care, when parents try to maximally and uncritically satisfy all the whims of their child. From childhood, the baby grows up in an atmosphere of constant approval, adoration, and admiration for him. Such conditions and the corresponding upbringing of the child actually program the child for a crisis situation in the future, the habit of being the best and the first, high level claims, on the one hand, and lack personal experience, inability to work - on the other hand, can cause hysterical child behavior.

Raising a Cinderella Child, or emotional neglect, leads the child to a feeling of his own uselessness in the family, he is a burden for his parents, without him everyone would be freer. The situation becomes even more complicated if the child has a brother or sister who is treated much better. Constant awareness of oneself as unwanted and unloved becomes the root cause of childhood neuroticism of the individual.

Rigid relationships are also types of improper upbringing: severe punishments for minor offenses, “taking out evil” on the baby. The whole family is in an atmosphere of hostility, an invisible wall has grown between the members, everyone lives on their own, without the help, support, care of others. Even if there are no fights or loud curses in the family, such circumstances affect the further mental development of the preschooler.

In the case of excessive moral responsibility, mothers and fathers have high hopes for the future of their child and expect great success from him. Most often, these requirements are a projection of the unfulfilled plans and dreams of parents. The child is constantly focused on not upsetting his family and meeting their hopes, as a result of which he experiences constant anxiety, tension, and fatigue, which also affects his state of mind and behavior.

Another reason for disharmonious upbringing is considered to be the presence of “competitive educators.” This is an example of a family where representatives of several generations are simultaneously educators. Parents, grandmothers, and aunts have different views regarding educational methods, and when implementing them, they often compete with each other. Such educational “mess” can become a source of anxiety for the child and lead to painful manifestations in his behavior.

Experience shows that parents who seek psychological help with “problem” or “difficult” children themselves suffered from conflicts with close adults in childhood. Now they subconsciously reproduce the “familiar style” of education.

It is important to note that children learn appropriate behavior patterns from their parents through observing their relationships. When the requirements for the rules of behavior and the parental example coincide, then the child will reproduce parental behavior, and if the parents say one thing and do another, demand honesty from the child, but they themselves deceive each other, call for restraint, but they themselves swear and fight, then for the child the situation of personal choice of behavior will be very difficult.

Since parents in the family are fully responsible for the moral and material support of children, their role is very important, especially in the early years. They must ensure the safety of children and be good role models, both mentally and physically.

Content

Problems of modern child rearing problems that parents face:

• Parents can let their children do whatever they want. In this case, children may become unruly and difficult to handle. Such children, as a rule, grow up to be sociable and assertive. This is not a bad thing overall, but it can lead to mental stress for parents.
• In most families, both parents work and often come home tired. And they cannot pay enough attention to their child; the child may feel deprived and offended. This kind of parenting can cause the child to become hostile towards others.
• Some parents strive to make their child better than themselves and are overly strict and punish for the slightest mistakes. In this case, children are afraid of their parents and obey them. However, they become overly dependent on their parents to make any decisions in their own lives.
• In addition to being emotionally dependent on their parents, children may also feel left out if there are financial problems.
• If parents themselves do not cope well with stressful situations, then this can also negatively affect their children, and they may acquire various fears without feeling supported.

Despite these problems modern education , there are some science-based tips to help you raise happy and well-behaved children.

It is necessary to understand the child. Many parents model their children on the examples of other families, but each child is different, and the parenting style that works for one child may not work for another. Therefore, the method of education depends on the individual. For example, children who do not cope well with their emotions may require more attention, while a socially adjusted child may suffer from overcontrol.

It is necessary to joke and play with children, this increases the child's creative skills. It is easier for such children to communicate with people in the future.

It is very important that parents stop looking for perfection in their child or in yourself. This kind of thinking is only increases stress and decreases confidence in yourself. We must try to reduce the pressure so that you and your child can live happier and calmer lives.

It is a well-known fact that parents, who constantly express negativity or treat people rudely children, as a result, they receive excessive aggression from the child, increasing with age. It is necessary to reduce the amount of anger in the house, this will reduce the chances of serious social problems in the future. A warm, caring relationship between mother and father helps reduce behavioral problems in children. By setting a good example, parents help the child create his own new, healthy family relationships in the future.

Don't let parenting responsibilities affect your marital relationship. Research shows that parents who suffer family problems, contribute to the formation of stress in their children, which leads to insomnia and other mental problems.

Children learn everything from their parents; successful parenting requires the active and constant spiritual, physical, intellectual and emotional presence of parents in the child's life. The more time spent effectively raising a child, the greater the chance that the child will be happy in the future.

Double standards - mom allows it, dad doesn’t, or vice versa.

Often disagreements arise in families regarding the upbringing of children. This happens because parents have different views on the same situation. Mom most often, having a softer character, allows something, and dad forbids it. In such a situation, it is difficult for a child to accept someone’s position, because the opinion of each parent is equally important to him. This confuses the child, because due to his age he himself cannot set priorities correctly.

First of all, parents need to remember that their opinions must coincide. In case of disagreements, it is better to discuss them among ourselves without involving the child in this. Clear boundaries - what is and is not allowed needs to be clearly defined.

Parents in any case, they must act together and in the interests of the child. Therefore, it is important that parents take equal part in raising the baby. The father, as a rule, serves as the breadwinner in the family and may be out of work, considering his duty fulfilled. Nevertheless, it is necessary to involve him in solving everyday issues and simply spending time together.

It is very important not to quarrel in front of a child, since a quarrel started on the basis different opinions can easily become personal and the reputation of the parents in the eyes of the child will be undermined.

Don't take your anger out on your child. We must listen to his problems, despite the fact that our own seem more important. Ask your child’s opinion as often as possible, discuss family problems with him.

Honesty- this is the basis of education. You shouldn’t lie to a child, just once is enough for the child to understand that you deceived him and it will be very difficult to regain trust.

The ability to make decisions and take responsibility for them is an important quality that must be instilled in a child from childhood. You need to listen to the child’s opinion and offer him possible options without imposing your own. Let it be advice, but he will make the decision himself.

It’s also not worth talking in a commanding tone. Successful completion of a task requires praise. Here it is better not to limit yourself to the banal “well done,” but to explain in detail what the child did and how important it is.

Children love when they are spoken to like an adult, so it is worth turning to the child for advice and listening carefully to his opinion.

Raise a child and instill in him the right values not easy. But if parents want to raise a strong and responsible person, you will have to make an effort and you will have to start with yourself. Child - blank slate and will repeat exactly what he sees in the very first teachers in life - that is, in you.

Therefore, it is important that parents adhere to the same views in education. Become the closest person to your child who can be trusted, then it will be easier for you to understand him and come to an agreement with him. And remember - harmonious relationships in the family provide a great guarantee that your child will also have prosperous family in the future.

Impact on the child.

Let's look at a few examples of the impact on children. The most negative way to raise a child is dictate. Unfortunately, many parents strive to control their child in everything, not giving them the opportunity to choose and make independent decisions. This has a bad effect on personal development. As adults, such children are usually withdrawn and have many problems in relationships.

Overprotection An adult is capable of raising a child into a dependent, infantile person with an insecure position in life. This is even dangerous because by protecting the baby from the slightest danger, we deprive him of the opportunity to learn to soberly assess the situation and act at the right moment.

Opposite side overprotection- non-interference. When parents are confident that by their absence in the child’s life they are giving him the opportunity to be independent, the situation turns out to be completely different. The child begins to feel unwanted and abandoned, and a feeling of alienation appears. In adulthood, problems arise with loved ones and the person is not able to build relationships.

Bad habits.

If you notice bad habits your child, then you must definitely wean him off them. We all know what children love thumb sucking, nose picking, nail biting and so on, all this is not so scary when the child has one or two habits, but if there are many bad habits, then parents need to work on it.

First of all, start with yourself, how much time do you devote to children, do you work with them. When there is discord in the family and frequent quarrels, children feel this and bad habits appear. But we should not forget about the problems of the medical sphere.

Any habit in a child can fixate and become a reflex To prevent this from happening, there is no need to demand too much from the baby and set impossible tasks.

Child sucks thumb and often he himself does not realize that he is doing this, at this moment the main thing is not to put pressure on him, otherwise you risk only worsening the problem.

The best way to get rid of bad habit in a child - role play. For example, your son bites his nails - offer him a game of manicurist and tell him how to properly cut his nails and care for them. Be an example for your children, get rid of bad habits yourself and you will see how children will imitate you, bad habits will disappear.

Another important problem in children is childhood aggression.

It is expressed in the desire to hurt others. Such children can torture animals and tell terrible stories.

It is necessary to understand the reason for this behavior of the child. Usually it is simple curiosity or lack of understanding of another being's pain. It is important to explain to the child that his actions cause suffering. If the older children in the family behave cruelly, the younger ones will also imitate them. Your main task is to prevent such situations in a timely manner, to teach children to love and care for each other.

Support your children, remember that your attention is very important to them. Increase your child's self-esteem by respecting his actions and decisions. Very often, at the time of a quarrel, parents make their children feel guilty about it. A child must know that he is loved and valued no matter what. The main thing is not to overdo it, otherwise you will develop a big baby's self-esteem. Praise your child only for real actions, reinforce his confidence in his abilities.

If you notice that children have begun to show arrogance towards others, talk to them. Let your children know that they will be treated the same as they treat others.

If something doesn’t work out for your child, then this is not a reason swear at him, at such a moment you need to encourage the baby and help him cope with the task. Any of your actions should be aimed at establishing trust between you and your children, this will help build a full-fledged relationship.

The most favorable The way to raise a child today is cooperation. What does it mean? In supporting each other as a whole family, in common goals and joint solutions to problems and tasks of a different nature. A child who is raised in such a family grows up to be a self-confident person who is able to make decisions and build his life.

The most important thing in raising children is to establish contact and mutual understanding. To do this, you need to see the child as an individual, respect your child’s choice and decision, and value his opinion. In this way, you not only increase your child’s self-esteem, but also his self-confidence.

Be an authority for your children, know how to listen and understand the situation. Many children cannot express in words what worries them, the main thing is that the child completely trusts you and then he turns to you for help or advice. To do this, you need to devote enough time to children, play with them, read and study. joint activities. If there are several children in a family, then it is imperative to build relationships with each child.

Think and reconsider your parenting style, because in most cases, when a child does not listen or is capricious, the problem lies in the bias of the parents, it is enough to simply listen to your children.

If there are no conflicts between parents and married couple shows respect for each other, then children will grow up well adapted to adult life. However, fulfilling these functions poses challenges for most parents. If you are depressed, then try not to show it to your child, try to solve this problem as quickly as possible, perhaps by contacting the services of a psychologist online.

Problems of preschool children are a frequent stumbling block for parents on the path to raising an independent and harmonious personality. Subsequently, they become the cause of the child’s difficult psychological adaptation in society.

This article will discuss the challenges that parents face in the process of raising little man, and solution options.

The main problems of child development in preschool age

Soviet psychologist Leonid Wenger classified the main problems of child development in preschool age using the following criteria:

• Intellectual characteristics: impaired attention, difficulties with learning new knowledge, poor memory.
• Behavior: uncontrollability, rudeness and aggression.
• Emotional background: excessive excitability, irritability, mood swings, anxiety.
• Interaction with others: touchiness, shyness, excessive desire for a leadership position in the group.
• Neurology: tics, poor sleep, obsessive movements, fatigue.

As a rule, there is not one problem in the development of preschool children, but a combination of them.

What conditions do parents and psychologists work with most often:

• Anxiety. Develops under the influence of regular feelings of anxiety, becoming psychological feature child's personality. The main reasons for its appearance are improper upbringing with excessive demands and poor interaction with parents. Sign: low self-esteem against the background of greatly inflated demands on oneself.
• Depression. This is a difficult to diagnose developmental problem in preschool children. The main symptoms are passivity, constant sadness, motor dysfunction, anxiety, fear, and unreasonable crying.
• Aggression. Develops as a result of mistakes in education. By being harsh and rude in raising a preschooler, parents provoke an aggressive reaction to current events, manifestations of selfishness, suspicion, and cruelty. The situation is aggravated by ignoring what is happening or, conversely, overly aggressive suppression. A proven method of preventing and combating aggression is showing care, attention, and gentleness.
• Inadequate self-esteem . By teaching a child to achieve a goal, adapting to the needs of others, parents form in him low self-esteem, which manifests itself in excessive obedience. The opposite state is inflated self-esteem, manifested in unfounded self-confidence, biased belief in the success of one or another undertaking. A distorted perception of oneself leads to interpersonal conflict, which negatively affects the formation of a little person. The main pedagogical task is to develop a preschooler’s correct understanding of himself and his capabilities.

The problem of communication among preschool children

Communication is everyone's need normal person. This necessary condition normal development of a small person, as a result of which speech skills are formed, the baby receives an education. But there are a number of factors under the influence of which a child falls out of the life of a social group and finds himself in a psychological blockade imposed by his peers.

The problem of communication in preschool children develops under the influence of the following reasons:

• Selfishness shown by the baby in relation to the other children. The result is a manifestation of indifference towards him.
• Touchiness manifests itself in the habit of crying, sneaking around, sorting things out, which gradually bores peers and they ignore the culprit of the “triumph of justice.”
• Passivity is manifested in the absence of one’s own opinion, the ability to invent games for friends and oneself.
• Severe shyness is another problem in the development of preschool children, leading to serious problems in the future.

The solution is to diagnose and correct child behavior. Due to the fact that parents have not undergone training on the topic “Child Psychology” and lack of appropriate education, practical experience and skills, it is difficult for parents to cope with the task on their own. Professional help in this case is a necessity.

The team of the French psychological and pedagogical center "SOCRATES" consists of international class specialists. In addition to fundamental knowledge, specialists are proficient in modern methods of working with children from 3 to 12 years old.

The relevance of the problems arising in the upbringing of preschool children is confirmed by the practice of the psychological and pedagogical center "SOCRATES". Inactivity is the cause of a number of other psychological disorders in older age.

Don't waste precious time, help your baby by ordering a consultation today!